How to Raise a Confident Child

What determines success in adult life? Education in conjunction with finding a qualified tutor at Care.com to support your child’s learning, and opportunity are probably the two most influential factors. But there’s a third one that sits just behind those two — and that’s confidence. A person could have all the resources in the world, but if they’re not confident, then it’s unlikely that they’ll make the most of all that’s available to them. 

Some people are naturally confident. But for the majority of people, it has to be nurtured. Some people nurture it themselves later in life, but it’s much better if the seeds of confidence are watered when the person is young. So you probably see where we’re going with this: if you want to have a confident child, then you’ll need to nudge them towards confidence. Below, we’ll run through some effective ways to do just that.

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Be A Role Model

Your child will pick up from you more than what you tell them. Have you ever noticed how children tend to become more like their parents as they age? That’s all because they’ve been picking up on a thousand cues throughout their children, only a small percentage of which were verbal instructions. So perhaps the best way to instill confidence in your child is to show confidence yourself. You can fake it till you make it, and the results will be the same — but for the most effect, and for your own well-being and happiness, look at developing your confidence on your own.

Set Goals

Setting goals — and, most importantly, achieving them — is an excellent way to build confidence in your children. The magical thing about this is that the goals you set with your child don’t have to be anything overly grand or ambitious; it can be a small goal, such as reading for fifteen minutes a day. However, over time, it’ll be best to increase the goals to be more ambitious. By the time they reach adulthood, they’ll be used to setting targets and working towards them, as well as having confidence that they can achieve those goals. 

Take Care of the Essentials

We tend to think of confidence as being related to achieving big things. But actually, it’s the product of achieving a series of small victories. A person who’s well-groomed, well-dressed, and well-rested will naturally be on their way to confidence, since they’ll be in a position to put their best foot forward. So make sure all the essentials are being met. This can involve taking them regularly to get their hair cut, which will bring a whole host of other benefits, as outlined on this website. You may also encourage them to keep their clothes presentable and explain the importance of grooming. 

Recruit Their Help 

You don’t gain confidence by sitting on the sidelines. You get it by digging in and helping out. There’ll be a bunch of things that your child could help with around the house; it’s just up to you to get them involved! They’ll likely kick up a bit of a fuss, since, well, they’d rather be playing outside, but slowly but surely they’ll be learning the value of hard work. Plus, there’s a lot of value from feeling connected to the family and playing a vital role. It’ll show them that they’re able to offer something of value.

Don’t Ask For Perfection

You see plenty of high-flying adults who seem to be confident, but inside, they’re not — they’re really just going through the motions because their parents expected them to be perfect. The way to really instill confidence in your child is to allow them to make mistakes. After all, it’s in our errors that we learn the most, and even if it doesn’t work out once, there’ll always be another opportunity to get it right. In truth, this approach won’t just benefit their confidence, but also more broadly help improve their mental wellbeing. 

Ask For Their Thoughts

Confidence comes from knowing that you matter and that what you say and do has value. From an early age, look at asking your children about their thoughts and opinions. It’ll help them to figure out the type of person they are and will make them comfortable with the idea of sharing their thoughts with other people. 

Encourage Positivity 

Finally, encourage positivity! The mind works in mysterious ways, and left to its own devices it can bash our confidence, especially if we’re always consuming social media. Teach your child to speak to themselves with kindness and love — it’s a habit that’ll serve them well as they go through life.